Fighting With Pigs

I grew up in the country. Growing up in the country gives you some experiences that you could never have in town or the city. One such experience was with pigs, but before I talk about pigs you need to know where I'm coming from. 

One of my brothers raised Quarter horses. So with horses and calves around sometimes when our folks were gone, we conducted our version of the rodeo. We broke horses, rode calves, or I should say attempted to ride calves. All this was exciting until a neighbor friend told us about riding hogs. We had never " rode a hog," and I'm not talking about a Harley. We didn't even know you could ride a hog. So one Sunday we went over to try out this new experience. 

I guess most of you know more about pigs than I could every tell you. So all I can relate to is my limited personal experience. Pigs seem to have a natural nature which gravitates to mud, and these hogs were no different. We "attempted" to ride the hogs. Attempt being the key word. Since there is nothing to hold on to you had to balance yourself on their back. This balancing act is a major accomplishment. Needless to say, it was not a pleasant experience. The hogs are always headed for their wallow. By one or two attempts we were as muddy as the pigs. And the smell was terrible.

As you sit there in your pious wisdom, you think why you would want to wrestle with a pig just to say you rode one? Good question? But from this experience, I learned two things that can be applied to dealing with people. One, if you wrestle with a pig, you're going to get muddy, and you will stink. Two, the pig enjoys the mud and the smell and doesn't need an excuse to get you in the same condition.

We have been admonished by Jesus not to cast our pearls before the swine. They cannot and do not appreciate or understand the value of the pearls. But they do understand the mud, and if they can, they will bring you to their level of understanding.

So how does this relate to people? There are people who act like pigs. And before you look around, remember this, we have all at one time or another acted like a pig. If this were not true Jesus would not have compared people with pigs.

I have watched with interest at the 4-H Fair when the Champion Showmanship contest is being held. It's the pigs that give me the most interest. These young kids make the pigs go where they want them, around chairs and into the pen. Their secret-- they stay in control.

So how do you deal with people who act like pigs? You stay in control. In reality, you stay in control of the conversation and your attitude. How can you stay in control? You choose to stay in control. You need to understand yourself. Why do you act and respond the way you do? People don't judge you by your intentions. They judge you by your actions. They don't judge you by your ideas; they judge you by your behavior. And I might add behavior is an indication of your needs.

We are still talking about knowing yourself. If you know why you act the way you do, then you should be able to understand people who are like you. Well, 70 % of all people fall into this first category they get excited by attention, achievement, recognition, adventure, excitement, and spontaneity. These people are persuasive, risk-takers, competitive, seek change, socially skilled, inspiring, open, direct, outgoing. But they are turned off by people who show a lack of enthusiasm for their projects, they don't like waiting, cannot stand indecision, or people who have to do things the same way all the time. They can't stand to hear "We've always done it this way." When things aren't going their way, they become pushy, intimidating, overbearing, restless, impatient, manipulative, abrasive, reactive and dominating. Keep in mind I said 70% of all people fall into this category.

Fifteen percent of all people are exacting, thorough, factual, reserved, meticulous, practical, calm, have high standards, and are risk-avoiders. They enjoy people who are a perfectionist, practical, like running their life, need lots of information, and are consistent. Why? That is what they do. They can't stand people who are over-assertive, careless, arrogant, and fakes. These people are slow to get things done; they are withdrawn, dull, sullen, shy, passive, and perfectionist.

Then we have a group that makes up 10% of all people. They are practical, orderly, very direct, self-determined, organized, traditional, goal-oriented, dependable, economical, ambitious. They like to control people; they enjoy responsibility; they master whatever they do, they are loyal, and like a fast pace. These people can be very dogmatic, stubborn, rigid, unapproachable, distant, critical, and insensitive. They don't like people who are ambiguous, lazy, show emotions and are irreverent.

Then we have a group that makes up only 5% of all people. They are team-oriented, caring, devoted, enthusiastic, helpful, accessible, trusting, sensitive, good listeners, good friends, like variety, very generous, and are peacemakers. They enjoy being popular; they like closeness, kindness, and caring people. They try to affirm everything. They don't like people who are insensitive, who cause dissension, who are insincere and are egoistic. They sometimes become to other-oriented. They are indecisive, impractical, vulnerable, they are always hesitant and are to subjective.

Now is it wrong to have anyone of these characteristics? No. But it is wrong to display a sixth-grade behavior, and become a verbal idiot by losing control of yourself? Yes!. This behavior is not conducive to Christian living nor is it of character for Christian conduct. When I know where your buttons are, or to use an expression of my father, Where your goat is tied, and I intentionally set out to make you upset, then I am wrong. 

The disciples even had a hard time working together. In looking at the Gospels we see in Luke 22:24 “And there was also a [strife] among them, which of them should be accounted the greatest.”

Paul in writing to the Christians at Rome addressed the problem of getting along with one another. Romans 13:13 "Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in [strife] and envying." 

The church at Corinth also had similar problems.1 Corinthians 3:3 "For ye are yet carnal: for whereas <there is> among you envying, and [strife], and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men?" James 3:14 " But if ye have bitter envying and [strife] in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. James 3:16 For where envying and [strife] <is>, there <is> confusion and every evil work." 

What does all this strife do? It creates anger. Is it wrong to be angry? No. It is a sign that you are human. To get angry often is a sign you are not surrendering or yielding to the leadership of the Holy Spirit. You have given away a piece of your mind. You have not learned to have peace of mind. For you to have peace of mind, you must learn to build trust with the individual with whom you are having problems. They do not view you as the positive, caring Christian you see yourself as. They do not trust you, they do not believe you are acting in their best interest so consequently, they don't care what you say to them or ask them. So, in turn, they push your buttons or turn your goat loose.

Building trust is your priority in succeeding with people who upset you. The fact is this: If a person doesn't trust you, doesn't believe that you genuinely care, he or she won't ever be compelled or motivated to cooperate with you or even consider your concerns. When a person doesn't trust you, your relationship is doom to fail. Building trust is difficult. And I might add, some people will never accept your efforts. It is their choice. No one is making them do or act they way they do. It is by their choice. They choose to be what they are right or wrong.

There are two major classes of people those you step out by faith and take a risk. Because they believe and trust in God-- their faith is operational. The second class will not take a risk they are faith-avoiders. They have lost confidence in their ability to walk by faith--their faith is non-operational. They have lost the peace of mind that comes from the surrendered life.

The Quaker John Rowntree speaks of the faith-avoider in this manner. “It is a great mistake to think that faith is exclusively or even mainly an affair of the heart, a question of the spiritual temper or attitude of the soul. Faith is a living, working power of the mind, which wills, desires, and hopes and trusts and believes and obeys. Aye, obeys. That is where our faith is weak. That is where we need the potency of the Gospel. We know better than we do. Perceiving the good we continually choose the evil--I am, shall we say, the average man.. If anyone were to say differently, I would be shocked. I read the Bible, perhaps sometimes wondering what I have read five minutes afterward. I go certainly once, perhaps under favorable circumstances, twice, to church, or meeting. I don't understand what is meant by the Trinity or the Atonement: I leave all that to the clergyman or the minister, but in a more or less definite way I believe that my earthly life is so irreproachable that my eternal future is sure to be pleasant. Christ, I say is my Savior, by which I mean that He will leave me alone in this world, and save me in the next. So I go on. Now and then someone upon whose companionship I depend on is called beyond the grave. On such occasions, I a deeply touched...And then the tide of life, business, and pleasure flows in again. The gap is filled. I forgot and once more am satisfied to live on the surface. I flutter through the hours like a butterfly in a meadow---dipping aimlessly now here, now there. But let me suppose that the strong blow off some great catastrophe was to smite me. Something that destroyed the routine of self-pleasing and compelled me to face the realities which I have steadfastly shirked. Let it be some permanent physical restriction like blindness, or some financial disaster involving bankruptcy---no matter what. Where do I stand no?. Everything is bitter, life and the interminable future are desolate. Suddenly I realize that my Christ was only a figure. I made Him and draped Him myself. I realize that at the heart of what I called my religion was but selfishness and that my insincerity has brought upon me the doom of spiritual emptiness."

If you find yourself in this condition, you are wrestling with the pigs. If you have grown dissatisfied with a drifting life, that has robbed you of all spiritual joy and victory then turn your life over to Jesus Christ. Yield yourself to Him. Surrender your will.